Chimes, Charms, Enchantment

“One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, 

and, it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words.”

~ Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe 

These photos are so February 2014!
 They've been lounging in my archive, waiting...waiting ever so patiently for me to write something and launch the post. Alas, days went by, and months, then life morphed into a maze of this and that, which rendered this blog buried in publish neglect. sad.

The Hubby and Me - enjoying our pose! 

Looking at these pics, you'd think I was the queen of high spirits, hah! 

Quite frankly, yes and even more bluntly, no! The prime truth of the matter is, these photos represent ooooh, snarky sobby' trying days rife with challenges and changes and not knowing what the future holds, what the next step would be, what to, where to, whatever! 

Life was a cliffhanger...SMILE! 

But the Divine was at work ( uuh' yah! ) and threw us an unmistakable thump to dress up swank and parteh', inspite of! Yes, inspite of sullied circumstances having been acquainted with folks less than honorable with their dealings. 

Ah, one must dig the grandest measure of  good out of a decrepit situation, wisen up like the evening owl, and brave forth like the most majestic of eagles ( drama!). 

Why the heck pout and gripe when all things are but temporal, even the muddled. These are the good old' days being ushered in! Welcome it! 

Cliffhouse, Tagaytay, Philippines

My youngest son with me.

And so we did!  In style! 

I donned my creamy favorite vintage dress ( + my grand brown hat too, let's not forget!), genuinely celebratory and thankful for the beautiful scenery, the wonderful people, and the glorious food!  

It was a sparkling time and I was touched by a serene spirit whispering, it was Valentine's Day, things would be OK. 

My eldest son.

That was way back February, cupid's shinning star moment of love. weddings, chimes, charms and enchantments that glistened the succeeding months of working situations with a smidgen of luck linked into one another, until here I am and here we are, in the future I was merely trying to picture back then! 

So let me see, what's there to learn:

1. Be calm. Inspite of trying times. Be calm. Calm is insight. Calm is wisdom. 

2. Present your best. Your best brings about solutions.

3. Enjoy. Even in the middle of muddles, life gives permission to laugh and be merry. It is essential to sanity.

"There aren't any shortcuts to tomorrow, you have to make your own way.To know where you're going is only a part of it.You need to know where you've been, too.And if you get lost, don't worry.The people who love you will find you. Count on it."  ~ Quotebites

Manna Bakery and Cafe ~ My Quick Respite

You have no idea, but I was spun strangled in a web of self-made frenzy the past weekend. My bad!

The HUBBY came down with a bone chilling fever that whacked his aching tired body to - the - sole and plastered him poorly in bed. I was vamooshed! Why, goodness, the man rarely ever gets sick, except for the allergies which would sneeze him out every now and then. I'm used to that. He's used to that. The boys have that as well.

Ah, but, other than that, he has the fit and form and heart of an athlete, according to his doc a couple of years back during his yearly executive check- up.. He's mighty proud of this, um, - medically certified - compliment and wears it like a gold star pinned on the lapel of his right psyche.

Day 1 to day 3 was quite toxic with trips to the ER and tests and consultations and tests again ( gad!). It was surreal  for me to have this fitness buff who'd bug me day and out about my - regimen - (hah!), looking buggered down, wan and pithy pale.

"Hey, relax, even Superman gets sick, y' know", he cracked, in a bid to snuff off my funk,  as I stood looking half wit worried down on him at the emergency room bed, feeding him thin wafers of grainy "Skyflakes" biscuit.

The doc pronounced a most likely viral infection, but the danger of Dengue fever couldn't be ruled out ( omg moment!)!  Hence, the meds and daily trip back to hospital for pricks and whatnot' consultations, which vexed him somewhat on the 3rd day of this roundabout', and further to the point wherein he scathingly reviled the bloodsucking routine. 

 Five days later to last night, his platelet count rose to the required healthy level. Thank  gawd!! What a relief for frazzled me. He was able to return to the office today in more or less his usual self.

Yah, well we know something good always comes forth from unexpected gales. Sailing midway through my inner hysteria, I found myself drifted off to a quaint little true bright happiness cafe. I'd say t'was my grace and miracles angels of life taking pity on hapless me.

I entered this little piece of peace and strayed myself half in trance on a corner taking in the  luscious sight of warm brown buns, deftly coiled breads, unmistakable old-fashioned sugar butter cookies - the stuff of my youth - and wicker trays of creamy muffins dotted syrupy red or blueberry-ish blue, and some cheesy too! 

I was swept into a releasing Hallelujah moment and knew then with a ping of exaltation that everything would be OK. Why wouldn't it be, when fate had just ushered me into the sanctum of the sweet Church of Muffins!! 

I - is - sAvEd!! :D

This here's my corner

--> See my bag? Witness the moment I went snappy with my pink partner walking solemnly here and there pondering the merit between muffins. It's no joke to pick one over the other when your mind is suffering from a case of short circuit.

Ditched the idea of muffins, though my eyes were whirled glue on the possibility. Eventually, after sensing the bated breath of the server in front of me, I settled for an exotic sounding "Banhi sandwich". No clue what that was but it sure sounded kinda' hippy, and the chef lady wore a striking fancy uniform which somewhat gave an imposing whiff of credence to whatever she'd make it out to be

Oh, and it was so pretty! All carrots on top, with spikes of radish and greens and orange bits of grilled chicken, haha! It was quite a creative feast ! And yes, it tasted as refreshing and tasty as it looked. Coupled with my rose vanilla tea, it was a bit of  a vacation for my sense. I even had the indulgence to read a chapter while slowly savouring my treat. 

So things are fine and better, with the usual drafty flow of things to do; things that seem to hunt you down and snap at your heels whimpering fix me! fix me! fix me! And so I go for it, all these business that deals with life, knowing that when things get a bit spidery tangled in my thoughts, I have the good propensity of finding quirky snuggly muffin places to center and rebalance and sniff sniff sniff the cinnamon-y scents that make this soul of mine come alive. 

MY GOLD GREEN MORNING

This was a day I woke in the morning and everything was all o' right with the world! We have those days don't we? Like a precious gift of a jeweled day tucked inside a small velvet box meant for one desired with the deepest truest love, a day as such it was. My heart was pumping bright sparks of positivity and my eyes could see no ill save all the beauty -

so I put on my running shoes and had a quick rounda'bout run and stopped here and there to snap here and there hoping - wishing to capture all the fresh green haze caught in my eye, for it was a delight to be in the company of  the spirit of the trees both grand and enchanting bonsai. 

╭•⊰✿¸.•*ღ "I am a mortal enemy to anything but a cheerful countenance and a merry heart, which, Solomon tells us, does good like a medicine."ღ

~ Abigail Adams

How I wish to give this justice, but mere me with my pink box of a camera tried our hippest best, to no avail. I could have done better, I suppose if I had more- talent.  Neverthemind, I am held most captive anyway by the sublime peaceable energy permeating the morning - of calm and serenity and well-being. 

The earth has music for those who listen, and yes, that day I was listening all eyes and ears and pores

And felt a bit of Sylvia Plat in her intense inspired moment - “I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, "This is what it is to be happy.” 
No mountains here for me, but all these gold green pings the thought --> what makes us happy? What indeed? Isn't that the question of questions? What makes us happy? There are moments that give a sportive answer. 

The tree which moves some to tears of joy is in the eyes of others only a green thing that stands in the way. Some see nature all ridicule and deformity... and some scarce see nature at all. But to the eyes of the man of imagination, nature is imagination itself.” ― William Blake

 

“The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quite alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. As longs as this exists, and it certainly always will, I know that then there will always be comfort for every sorrow, whatever the circumstances may be. And I firmly believe that nature brings solace in all troubles.” 

~ Anne Frank

Mother Days:Feathering The Nest

"The business of life is the acquisition of memories." 

I'm quoting Downton Abbey here. Season 4 if I'm not mistaken - where it goes on to say, "In the end that's all there is to it, afterall." 

Sobering. And to the point. And true. 

Very true.

Here ( actually, the pic up there) are my Mother's Day knick knack memories - in posted pictures: 

• a can of mixed nuts ( always crazy for mixed nuts!) 
• 2 newly bought books ( been a while - glad I found a real swell copy of Scarlett Feather. My old copy is torn bad to bits)
• girlie blue flower sneaks ( so sweet and cheap - hard to resist, haha!) 
• my forever, never to wilt flower power ( whatcanisay? I'ma' practical gal, lol!), 
• and a framed photograph of my sons at that adorable age when I was still queen mommy of the wild wide world of the wise, in their eyes! I miss those days. 

Now here's a glimpse of my flower homey - my nest,  the sacred space where all the mother feather(ing) action happens. It has a hue of its own, an obliging energy that takes the mood of the moment (always) to give off converted vibes of comfort - much like trees do' - sucking environment and processing  to exhale oxygen. 

My hearth pulses alive and encompassing in kindness. Old walls absorb our daily frantic rush, our loopy gaggling' guffaws, our ever pedantic sermons, our complications, our prayerful vocations, our whispered adorations and, yes, my feral shrieks when I kinda' go ballistic, hehe! 

As much as I mother the flesh of my own, my home mother's me. It mother's my dreams, my longings, my fears, my creativity, my plans, the dusk of my darkness, the light of my soul - it mother's it all. 

Holly and holy, feathered corners speak of sacred..of the Queen of Heaven and her perpetual help, of the Christ Prince of Peace, the Holy Family, the dedication to the Lord Father for whom dwellings tell, "As for me and my house,we shall serve the Lord," of  Buddhist blessings of  zen mindfulness, and of ancient Hestia's goddess function  for the Okios: home is temple -- the hearth house of socio religious and political stability.

There is a day for the applause of Mother's....but a day is nary enough to capsule the entire cost and profit of a woman's life baptized in motherhood. There is mutiny of emotions, volumes of recollection, the complicated merger of pleasure and pain in the acquisition of memories to stamp a date dedicated to the august of parenthood. 

I remember Mother's Day gone past - when my sons were boys..the flowers and cards and kisses...scribbled notes. But even more in my heart is etched those o-r-d-i-n-a-r-y days when there was nothing to commemorate. How they'd come to me with wild flowers- an offering of their innocence...days when they'd  hand me notes - cute crooky drawings to show love for mommy...

Those..are the days I treasure most. Not a specific Mother's Day - but a string of Mother Days that braid all moments to today. 

Days of feathering the nest, they are a celebration....and each moment we parent the day, inspite of its setbacks and tantrums and misbehaving minutes is a toast to the good times....

Life is memories, a continuous feast of faithful memories if we make it so. Tis' the business of life - and that's all there is to it - in the end - afterall.  

St. Therese ~ A February Devotion

Dear Little Flower, make all things lead me to heaven and God, Whether I look at the sun, the moon, the stars and the vast expanse in which they float, or whether I look at the flowers of the field, the trees of the forest, the beauties of the earth so full of color and so glorious, may they speak to me of the love and power of God; may they all sing His praises in my ear. Like you may I daily love Him more and more in return for His gifts. Teach me often to deny myself in my dealings with others, that I may offer to Jesus many little sacrifices.

Saint Thérèse, the Little Flower of Jesus, please

pick a rose from the heavenly garden, and send it

to me with a message of love.

I ask you to obtain for me the favors that I seek (here mention your request).

Recommend my request to Mary, Queen of

Heaven, so that she may intercede for me, with you,

before her Son, Jesus Christ.

If this favor is granted, I will love you more

and more, and be better prepared to spend eternal

happiness with you in heaven.

Saint Thérèse of the Little Flower, pray for me.

Grace and Miracle, like two winged sweet sister angels of faith have been walking my side since February ushered in. I took no notice till a moment ago when the thought pulsed my mind like a sudden heartbeat.  

I smiled a secret content when it occurred how in constant subtle ways the heavenly realm has been and is ever present around, above, below and within me: in my bleak minutes, in my breaking pains, in my darkest waking being. It draws even clearer as I sit here sensing this startling tactile reality. All my guiding angels are in attendance. 

Love oozing from little gaps between cracks, they're everywhere. There's a certain shine to my days, a sheen, a glitter, a glint and charm.

Grace and miracles...I am lifted! 

♥Fiat Lux ♥´¯`•.¸¸.• ♥L❀VE ♥´¯`•.¸¸.• ♥ •

Catching Light Chasing Shadows ( Lux Lucis Vita )

1-28 2014 Maybe this resonates with you. Maybe it doesn't. A moment when slices of decorous days turn sour and your light within extinguishes itself without apology.

Suddenly, your inner colorful morphs into a mottled palette overnight, a drab washed out lizard salmon of a life. That tempest within, she wakes, cocking what a diminutive dun you are.

Facing shadows - a melancholy one must battle.The past days have been so for me. What was there to do but embrace it. My adoring gratitude goes to the one who is patient and who believes and makes me laugh, until once again I am suffused with the sensation of bright - a conduit to the honest happiness around me. Tis' over. Now, I claim my emergence.

"One need not be a chamber to be haunted...

one need not be a house.

The brain has corridors

surpassing material space."

- Emily Dickinson

Something is happening to me. For weeks on end I am swept over by a sour suffocating smog of the soul. As if my spirit, once blithe and carefree, all of a sudden felt faint weary, begging for rest - that long deep dreamless rest of the ones who sleep. Scares me. 

I am not unfamiliar with my shadow. We are....acquainted.
Once a year I am besieged with an un - s.u.n.c.t.i.m.o.nious vacuum that knifes through my being. A veritable selfishness, sloth and venom of days wherein I pace my dysmorphic earth with hollowness. As if nothing exists and matters. Ghostly. A self satisfied canting of there is no mend. 

End.

I speak to it - at it - my barren shadow. 

Not with fights. Not with accusations. Not with soothing words nor with acceptance. 

Letting it be, I walk it through capturing beams and prisms as light amiably slants through branches, leaves and twigs, settling in streets, lawns and bends. Lucent.

I catch the light 

and I catch it 

and catch it 

and catch it. 

Until captured, the light becomes me,
and becomes me,
and becomes me,
and finally,

becomes me,
chasing my shadow -
away. 

Lux Lucis Vita

CATCHING LIGHT CHASING SHADOWS
( a photo journal - click on the link to view all pictures.)

This Mindful Moment smack' in the Middle of 40's!

Maybe it's the scalding hot peppermint tea, maybe it's the yellow decongestant, but thank God, I can breath again, somewhat. Suffering from allergies that's me right now; my chest feels constricted, my eyes blurred, head a block of  achy' - my back a plyboard stiff solid discomfort , ears clogged partly, and then there's my nose too..the right disobliging nostril. There are days when I literally feel that parts of me are on finicky' strike, refusing to reason with my mind, huffy belligerent as an errant pugnacious adolescent. Hah, which happens to be exactly what I'm done with - adolescents - teenagers, to be exact! 

 My 22.4 year old youngest enrolled in college, for what would be his last semester! Might I say,  this is a yelpy' "hurrah" moment for me, though in turn there's also that mommy horror rub-a- dub' fear of an absurd grim chance he would flunk a subject -  a cuckoo possibility far remote as Timbuktu' because his grades have been historically above par since shifting to Media Studies from Accounting, whew! Plus, my loves know what a classic hissy fit La Diva' Mama is capable of when her sensitivities are trifled with, hehehehe! :D 

So there, with my eldest just graduated and the youngest on his way, I patiently endure my soggy' flared sinuses, smile and  bow in exhaled gratefulness for the lot I have in this mindful, change charged moment smack in the middle of a 40's mid-life! 

Do I worry? Yes! Do I worry? Yes! Do I worry? Yes! I am the granted "Queen of Worrydom" currently, as I grind my mind (yes, I can) trying to divine a perfect future for the boys; a future where no unsound choices are made, no calculating jerks are met. If this mother may, for them I vouchsafe simply exact smooth transitions from one level of professional success to another, leveling up to unmitigated bliss of sound familial glory, until (finally) crowned philanthropic brilliance. Suave.

Survival.  Success. Significance. BUT, without the caustic arduous messy struggling stumbling crusty pain filled parts. Cosmeticized photoshopped existence (?) Quite subhuman, really. How imprudent of me to think it.  

If I could only live their lives for them, side-stepping wrong decisions, plucking ripe worthy aspirations to grant at the end of it all, the fullness of their life's true meaning..then I would. Because, right now when I gaze at them young at the cusp of beginnings, I live my life in sentimental  retrospect pin-pointing exactly my gains, salutes, strengths, victories, as well, as the thudding faults, groping blunders and downright errors I had to grapple with. Like the "Oracle" in the "Matrix" I want them to be the "One". I want to reveal the "path". What a foolhardy' fallacious aspiration, for there isn't any super power for me to give or grant. They have to make for themselves what they are and walk what road they choose to pave. Very much the way it was and is for me. 

Awhile ago, one of them asked what my "goal" in life is.  He followed it by saying his goal is to be able to help the "less fortunate"....  

My goal is what it has always been since I've decided to be a mother. To be as a   significant lighthouse...inviolable...weatherbeaten perhaps, but ever reliant in sunshine, enduring in storms, imperishable in tremor and gracefully standing in calm. I may pursue varied "interests" - but they are not goals. I only have one life on this plane. I am Lady Prism..my life purpose is iconic... I am an encompassing beam and a  forever light ( my children)  that's yours. 

I'll be watching you. 

Live, Love & Laugh

February Musings on the Wisdom of Celebrating Felicity

Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥

Lady Wisdom has built and furnished her home;it's supported by seven hewn timbers. The banquet meal is ready to be served: lamb roasted, wine poured out,table set with silver and flowers; Having dismissed her serving maids, Lady Wisdom goes to town, stands in a prominent place and invites everyone within sound of her voice; 

"Are you confused about life, don't know what's going on? Come with me, oh come have dinner with me! I've prepared a wonderful spread--fresh baked bread, roast lamb,carefully selected wines. Leave your impoverished confusion and live! Walk up the street to a life with meaning. ~ Proverbs 9:1-6

Thanks a million dee' to chance that I read this verse early this morning after the events of having gotten' out of the wrong side of the bed and behaving like a half twit' bat  towards someone - ok - towards one of my sons who was frantically searching for a sock. But by golly' I have not been remiss in warning everyone that I am barely human before 9 am and goodness knows what groggy creature I may be at barely past 5  with nary a slug of coffee, bah!

• ♥ • All survived and it is a pleasant afternoon presently with me recalling that half a minute charged dawn mini-drama which all but placed an imperceptible dent on what is blossoming to be a pretty memory of a charming February. Much have I to recall of laughter and felicity and perhaps, yes, perhaps I could give myself a little pat on the back for somehow keeping "me" together during crookie' moments when times weren't so favorably right and I had the power within me to actually make things worse -> only I didn't, hahaha! Wee'..a bit grown wiser may I becoming? Perhaps, perhaps...

I am grateful for the inspiration of the Highest Wisdom who reigns me in and soothes my being when I whisper a prayer that twines around • ♥ • "please, I want to be strongly gentle...not riled or rattled or rock frenzied by muddled circumstances...let me be the bearer of wise silence when someone unburdens on me, patient and understanding and courageous in holding forth my two cents worth unless genuinely desired.. ♥

  And since it's February and one can be more than pardoned for being a little bit brash with bold pronouncements of "charmed living," (hehe!) it is Without Apology that I flagrantly brandish pictures of  --->
Living My Own Style of A Charmed Life!

"If you celebrate your differentness, the world will, too. It believes exactly what you tell it through the words you use to describe yourself, the actions you take to care for yourself. Tell the world you are one-of-a-kind creation who came here to experience wonder and spread joy. Expect to be accommodated." ~ Victoria Moran

Tis' with a strain of awkwardness that I try to live the above wit, for hooked maliciously on a strand of thought is a hair of guilt that I don't deserve to enjoy - anything; that every moment I cherish is selfishness on my part when there are so many I know wallowing in misfortune of some sort. It sounds mighty crazy but this truth brings out the most unsavory unladylike and quite repulsive side of my character; for instead of enjoying the moment and being grateful of life, I unconsciously reflect negativity, become gravely withdrawn and stoically project an ill perceived manner so flagrantly unbecoming. Thank goodness, that the great God in his marvelous mercy worked with time, and I daresay, through the love of my partner causing my inner person to relax and mellow and be serenely healed, if I may say so, of myself.  

Today, I fondly welcome these chains of beautiful simple abundance moments that always present themselves to me. I laugh, I love and live with a focus on the moment. And when I find myself being led to thoughts of doom, I wrestle it captive to the love of God. It's not easy. But I am not alone.

Now here's that bit of chocolate cake I had last luvy duvy' Valentine's day, hehe!  Bit of a surprise really - I wasn't expecting to go out that evening. The LOVE had a very hectic day and I preferred to celebrate a quiet evening at home. My cell rang mid- afternoon and he absolutely insisted that we go out. Wouldn't even tell me where,  so I was seamlessly thrilled by the mystery of it all, haha! Round 6 pm he picked me up and still - wouldn't divulge much info, until we reached city proper and stuck in traffic  gave the restaurant a call to make sure our table would be held  in reserve for us. Dawned on me, but of course, where else would it be most perfect to spend a lovely night but at TITANIA's Wine Cellar!  We had been there once  about a year ago for a platter of cheese and wine, and vowed we would be back for the whole deal as I was enamored with the place. What perfect timing!

How can I describe it - that night - except to say that both the place, the food and the crowd merged into a frolic of red upholstered loveliness  - quite a heady aura of "Phantom of the Operaesque" romance cloaked with a wonderfully fortunate ending. Suffice it to say, the evening qualifies as one of those memorable Valentines I would with fondness recall when I get to be all crinkly old (cute) and grey. 

Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥
Each day offers us the gift of being a special occasion if we can simply learn that as well as giving, it is blessed to receive with grace and a grateful heart. ~ Sarah Ban Breathnach

2013- A Year That Promises Sparkles

Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥
She who leaves a trail of glitter always sparkles! ( and is never forgotten too, haha!) And that's what 2013 will be for me - a - trail - of - sparkles! I am setting out to make the coming year a jolly, joyful, mirthful, laughter filled year. I dare declare it my jubilee year; 365 days of purposely planned and carefully crafted effervescent days of  joy.- I mean that - or my name isn't Lady Prism, haha!

The way I see it, you and I are both vessels of light. I am - You are- light incarnate! We are meant to shimmer and  radiate. Whatever religious affiliation, ideology, conviction, race, color or creed, Christmas is for all. It is the rekindling gift of light by the Christ, our Redeemer, offered to every single living thing on earth, be it man, woman, child or creature. Let everything that has life praise the Lord, the Good Book says, for He has come to give us joy, a joy the world cannot give.

The Christ of Christmas I know is the spirit of the loving Nazarene, a beacon of love and light, who without earthly political agenda set out to boldly speak of hope, forgiveness and redemption. His message was one of living on higher ground through the practical application of kindness towards self and neighbors. Such a very simple, plain preaching devoid of religious hysteria it was hard to take then, and hard to take now.

And as we are reminded by the season to live in joy, I am personally filled to the brim with a hope of having my light within rekindled luminescent.  A happy me means a happy community of those around me.  I want my happiness to flow because I want my joy to touch you. Being happy takes conscious effort. It takes work. It takes loving discipline; a positive focusing of thoughts hinged on faith. Whatever is good, whatever is lovely, whatever is worthy of praise, think only of those things, the Good Book says.

Being happy takes planning, organization and  execution. The world created out of chaos was formed into order, so should our lives be. It takes sacrifice at times, a giving up of temporal enticements that appear exciting at the present moment but lead nowhere except to  the inner enclaves of spiritual destitution and moral disaster - for if the light in you is darkness, how terribly dark it will be.  Happiness takes courage and a dash of bravery too! It takes giving up and  letting go. It takes an open heart and an open mind. Happiness is not only being with people, it is at times wrestling with a loneliness so deep, facing whatever need be, then plodding on until the clouds break through and light bursts forth again. Happiness is consciously casting out whatever dark thoughts that assail the spirit during downtrodden days, believing that we are never truly alone. Happiness is the mastery of patience, the generosity of understanding, and the charity of forgiving - everyday.

These words I write simply because in times when I feel less than shinning, it would do well to refer the fact that I am a person who chooses to be happy. I am created for joy. My happiness does not hinge on objects to own or people to possess. It isn't hooked on how I am perceived by others either looked up or looked down upon. My happiness is not flared by the grand theatrics of a howling, drinking partying crowd, nor seduced by ominous racks of designer must haves. It isn't rocked by despairing days or rendered arrogant by triumph. My happiness stems from a confidence that I am esteemed by a God of Love and, that my worth is far above rubies. My fave Max Lucado book says it all - God wants you, just the way you are. And this, this is the happiness that makes me sparkle. This is my light. A light that you and I both share, magnificently lit from an everlasting radiant Divine source that kindles from within.

“You are the light of the world.
A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 

~ Matthew 5:14

On Higher Ground

Each of us makes our own weather, 

determines the color of the skies, 

and the emotional universe which we inhabit. 

~ Fulton J. Sheen

Possessing a cottage by the sea, living lulled by wavy foamed lazy waves and taking leisurely walks in warm sugar bleached sand is a romantic notion that buoys my Piscean  fancy. -- The cottage: stony rustic with wistery climbing bounganvilla on its tiled clay roof, or vintage white timbered with a white porch facing the waves, or tropical quaint bamboo(ed) `with latched windows accented with dangling yam purple orchids and mango yellow flowerbells -- 

Or it may not be the dream of a sea but of an idyllic provincial cottage (a happenstance convenient10 minute drive to the city, haha!) complete with trellises of sweet yellow bells and fun hello's of friendly neighbors. 
---- little whimsy dreams because in reality I live neither by the sea.....nor  in some seductive romantic back road inn..fronted by a landscape of bliss. ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ

There are painters who transform the sun into a yellow spot,
 but there are others who with the help of their art, 
their intelligence, transform the yellow spot into sun. 
~ Pablo Picasso  

  Nevertheless, I wear this weather of blue skies in the inner insides of me and have colored my homes ( yes, each one I've lived in to where I am today) with the strokes of my emotional universe --> being that what I described above . And it delights me when friends smile and coo' "what a pretty space you've created" ( I have to articulate this because sometimes I forget and grumble and fret so).

 This is how I want to live forever and ever -- > taking a yellow spot and transforming it into the sun --> taking something mundane and working my miracle to make it come alive. Each day to live this way would be such a pleasure.   
 ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. 
  
A tender reminder this is for me --> to trust that I am guided in my path. In moments of doubt and questioning; when a bite of fear sinks deep in my soul and I let slip how very well I am infused with strength that comes from above, it would be well to acknowledge the oft evoked phrase that goes "...we have not been given a spirit of fear but of love". 

Yesterday I was very much uplifted by what I chanced at a women's devotional website.
 
"My heart has no desire to stay
where doubts arise and fears dismay
Though some may dwell where these abound,
my prayer, my aim, is higher ground.


Lord lift me up and let me stand,
By faith on Heaven's table land
A higher plain than I have found;
Lord plant my feet on higher ground." 

 Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥
  
Today's musing leads me to the following insights:
1. We each make our own weather.
2. We determine the color of our skies.
3. We determine the emotional universe which we inhabit.
4. We can transform even a spot into something pretty
5. We are a spirit of LOVE
6.  We can live on higher ground.
 Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥¸¸. ,•ღ. ℒℴνℯ •ღ. ℒℴνℯ♥¸.•*”Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥

- all photos and paintings by me :D